As a highly sensitive person who can feel what the other is feeling, and who often cares and is very impacted by the feelings and experiences of others.. you quite likely learnt how to regulate the emotions in the environment (or at least feel vaguely safe) by tuning into others and changing your behavior to soothe Them. This leaves you in the precarious position of needing Them to be regulated (or loving, or kind) in order for you to be ok. The alternative to this is to learn how to regulate your nervous system as a distinct and self-loving survival function, inside your own body. Which is great. Because that’s where your incredibly intelligent survival and intuition impulses originate!

When you’re inside your own body (and trusting it), you can experience regulation, settling and resilience regardless of the psychic/emotional noise around you.

This is Big. And has a BIG impact on whether you feel you have Choice and the ability to step away from situations that don’t serve you. Cause lets be honest.. when you’re living from remote control, it takes way more energy to operate things, and isn’t really that satisfying longterm.

The thing that stops many empaths from moving from remote control to inhabiting their own animal body, is that when we first turn attention to the inner experience, we may initially feel a lot of strong and even “unsafe” feelings, sensations or emotions. Many folk will take this to mean “I just need to try harder to regulate everyone else” or “Shit, it’s not safe in my body, so I’m leaving the whole Body-thing altogether and disassociating to somewhere safer!”

So rather than these 2 (exhausting) options.. We can instead treat it like we’re wooing a wild animal.

Imagine with me that your nervous system is a wild tiger who’s retreated into a cave and is definitely not sure about whether it’s safe here. It’s holding a long history of strong feelings and quite a bit of overwhelm and it would secretly really love someone to come and help it feel safe in the world. All this wild animal knows so far is that it’s told to be quiet when it’s upset, or that it blows its lid when it can’t hold back anymore. … So you wouldn’t start by going right up to the tiger and talking to it, or poking it.. You’d start by being general and open. You might start by just sitting down and being quiet a distance away from it, looking at the sky or the dirt under you, Being.. Allowing the animal to feel that you mean to be kind and to listen without any pressure or demand.

How is it to be here? in this moment, in the room or space you’re in? Is there anything pleasant or okay about your experience? If there is.. Can you ask yourself – how do you know that you know it’s pleasant? What tells you? Maybe there’s a warm feeling in your belly, or your eyes soften a little at the edges. Maybe you notice your breathing is a little deeper than normal and stroking the fabric on your pants feels soothing?

When you spend time noticing and attending to these pleasant or okay things, it’s like placing treats at the entrance to the cave for your nervous system, and giving your felt-sense animal time to come out, check things out and be nourished by the treats…

From here, this incredibly simple practice (of taking time with what’s ok and feeling it in your body) will have helped your nervous system settle enough to get closer and get curious with it.

In my sessions with clients, this part of our work is a lot about experiencing the different branches of the nervous system (flight, fight, freeze, social connection/fawn) as safe.

If, as you hang out with feeling and sensing your body, the settling that came with the pleasant sensations shifts into agitation in the legs .. we’d spend time checking out if (contrary to the automatic response to start thinking, leave or reach out to charm me or get angry) this agitation is ok to feel.

This is groundbreaking for many people. That their uncomfortable sensations Aren’t a signal they need to react by Doing something to get away from them, but a signal the body has something to say, or the body is storing stress.

Together we gently move from something nourishing (a pleasant emotion, thought or sensation in some part of the body) to the thing you’ve previously avoided. The agitation, the fear, the anger or the vagueness. As you experience that you Can handle the sensations inside your own body, they will begin to settle and disperse and change to something more regulated. And like this, you are building your capacity (and love!) for staying with and IN your body.

Slowly you start to trust that feeling of constriction when someone asks you to help them with a task, and you say “I cant do that, sorry” rather than (internally) “what do they need? will they be super upset if I don’t say yes? Am I safe to say no?” .. and then overriding yourself and saying yes when you actually mean no.

You start to build a primary relationship with You, your animal body and your life force. Life in a body then becomes pleasurable, becomes open, becomes free(er).

I take female practitioners through this process in my 3 month 1:1 program and it makes such a huge difference to how they feel in themselves, to their energy levels, their resilience and enjoyment of their good work in the world, and also of their precious love for themselves… from inside their own body.

Shifting to embodied self-connection also means the boundarylessness and confusion of living from remote control is no longer there. You know what you want, what you feel and eventually, clearly, what’s right for you. Of course, this impacts your clarity with stating your rates at work, your boundaries/choices in relationships and your capacity to step away from dynamics that drain you. Being and empath is a gift.. but not when we ignore the messages from the sensitive apparatus that is your body.

This program is a good fit for you if you’re ok with feeling your feelings, have done a decent amount of inner work and are spiritually oriented. It’ll be good for you if you want to serve your populations (clients or family) but don’t want to do the same old over-giving and exhaustion, and if you hold a thread of knowing to the wisdom of the earth (even if it’s dormant… I have a particular love and gift for shining a light on the wisdom in You). We move through 3 phases, embodying your spiritual and animal knowing, healing unconscious patterns held in the nervous system and attachment system and strengthening your relationship with your inner judge and your mind so you can move forward with strength, resilience and self encouragement!

If you’re interested, reach out HERE, I’ll ask you some questions to see if we’re a good fit and we could begin soon

We work together for 3 months on the following things:

1. Meeting the critical, comparing voice inside that drives you to be so busy (that show up as endless lists of things to do, or criticisms of how you’re doing based on unrealistic standards). You learn how to reduce the amount of power these parts have in your life and invite other parts of you forwards that know how create the healthy balance and self-love you desire.

2. Creating healthy boundaries with your communications and responsibilities. Many women who’ve been in survival mode’s boundaries are non-existent, rigid or collapsed. This step will help you find what you want and need and give you the tools and safety to express this in a firm and clear way that doesn’t cut people or connection out. This step is about empowering you to stay soft and firm as you build a new way of life. We also focus here on giving you clear structures around self-care, work and personal commitments so your phone and emails don’t intrude, and your family commitments support you rather than drain you.

3. Regulating your nervous system to balance your emotional, physical and mental state. Your nervous system is the source of your automatic and repetitive behaviours, so when you learn how to regulate this primal operating system you create foundational flexibility and responsiveness (as opposed to brittle, reactiveness) and reduce the amount that stress and trauma stays in your body and brain. You also build your ability to feel and experience pleasure and rejuvenation. In this step, we address lingering, unprocessed trauma that may have had you stuck in activated and “on” states or shut down and numb so much of the time.

4. And once we have all these elements in place, we complete the program with practices and processes to help you open to receive pleasure and relaxation in new ways, and design your new life from this newly Reset place.

You get 9 x 1.5hr sessions, 9 x 15min laser coaching calls, homeplay practices and unlimited email contact to help you through the process.

In order to qualify for this offer, you must:

1. Be looking for a pivotal change in the way success looks and feels for you (and ideally be looking for mentoring to help you land more fully in your body and out of your head),

2. Have the capacity to feel your feelings, and have done some reasonably consistent mindfulness processes in your life,

3. Deeply value being a positive impact in your world (even if you don’t have energy to be that now).

4. And not be currently suffering from autoimmune conditions (this method is hugely supportive if you do have autoimmune conditions, but it would likely take longer than 3 months to get you the to results).

The investment for this life changing Reset is mid-four figures, which compared to the time, energy and money spent trying to follow the mindset, therapy or nutritional pathways to change your base operating state, (plus the expense on your health, relationships and overall quality of life in the meantime), is a total no-brainer. With this program, (as long as you qualify) you will have everything you need to avoid burnout and feel connected and inspired to create a life that you love again.

If you’re interested in this offer, just reach out on the contact form and we’ll have a quick chat to see if it’s a fit for you.

As she told me a little of her profound 18-year journey with healing her womb, I found myself getting fired up and affirming how much other women hearing it could be profoundly helped too, into a deeper self-connection and touch with their inner power source. Her story was pretty big.  So.. we’re gonna do an interview and record it (I’ll share the link with you to tune in when it’s ready).

Since this interaction, I’ve been writing reams about celebrating and uplifting each other.

And here is some of it

We are singing ourselves homeWe are singing ourselves home
In the bodies of each other
Each time you feel safe in my presence
Each time I see love pouring from your eyes
The act of loving another is as intimate as loving yourself
Giving to another
Lifting another up
It’s the same as lifting yourself
Can you feel it? 
The energy of another’s shine? 
When you really take them in, isn’t it as deeply satisfying as shining from the inside? 
There’s no separation
The time of competition and lack is over
Let us fall into the rich river of co-awakening
What power there is when you lift the other as fiercely and devotedly as if it were your own self 
What a Geiser of up-rushing good!
What joy and simple, but enormous, celebration 
My inner realms have constant waving pom-poms
.. a cheer squad, partying silently just for You
Colour and joy
At your rising 
At the hints of your light shining through
Shine through shine through my love 

The mother in you.
The business or career woman hungry for change,
The one who desperately cares for the environment and the one who just wants to see the world meditate itself to peace

I. Am. Celebrating. You

When people come to me and speak what they long for, the quiet voice that is ready to roar, the story full of richness and value, there’s a “fuck yes” in me. 
My hand is reaching out to all those wandering and yet to choose.. and I’m saying.. “this way.. what you want is this way” .. let’s put a fire under your bum.. remember what you long for and let it carries you forward into something you don’t yet know, but you know you want.
You can do this and we’re hungry for you to show up. 
And I’m built to stand here welcoming you Home.

Big love to You
Amanda

Pin for later!

Last week I was playing with some old worrying issues and doing a good job of “suffering” with them. As often happens when I’m in need, I felt a familiar tug to go and pick up a pen and paper. That tug is like feeling a parcel of words wanting to be heard, or a particular energy wanting to be felt .. And this is what came out. Hopefully, it will soothe and settle your worrisome places too 🙂

Preamble: I want to invite you to bring your worrisome thoughts here, now.

Just bring them as if you could offer them to something caring, and wise outside of yourself. Maybe something bigger than you that knows you as well or better than you know yourself. Now bring those worrisome thoughts and feelings (if you have any!) .. cause these are my INSTRUCTIONS from the Big Boss:

Dear one…

Give it all over to God

All of it

All the iddy biddy thinking bits

The worrying bits

the longings and … that big one you’ve been chewing on since you were a little tot

Give it all over to Life

Give your “getting it right” over

Give your “fucked it up”,

Give your “how will I ever?!”

Give it up.. it’s not yours to carry anyway

Give your hopes like cherished little birds, give them over

Give up your “next moment it’ll be better”

Give it All up.

And feel the Spaciousness that is you

And.. Pray

Ask to be shown

Ask to be guided

Let go of the ropes and see where the stream will carry you

Chances are it’ll be into something more soft and relaxing

Chances are it’ll be into something closer to that sense of You (not the “person” you, but the Being you)

It’s not personal, none of it, Life wants you to Relax.. ok??

So give it over. And enjoy the gift of This moment, right here

…

Do you have a nutty concern niggling at your insides? Would you like to have a go at getting your own Instructions from the Big Boss-Flavoured-like-You?

Here’s how:

1. Formulate a question about your concern or worry. Write it down

2. Take your pen and, using your non-dominant hand, let the pen (and your Big Boss/inner gudiance) answer. Let it stream and flow out.. it may sound like goobligook at first, just trust.

3. Act as if. Act as if you have access to an incredibly wise and benevolent being who has Exactly the answers and energy you need for your life right now. Act as if and let the pen and your hand show you how …

4. Let me know how you go!!

What’s happening in Wisdom Body World?

A Whole Lotta Self Care

You may have noticed that it’s been Super busy around here. A house move with a new clinic space in Ocean Shores, new fortnightly clinic opening in Paddington/Brisbane (I’m there again this weekend) and a 5 day trip to Melbourne just recently. Mama Gena, a woman whose work I deeply love and admire says that when the pressure is on with more work and more demands, you’ve gotta increase the self-care and pleasurable practices in equal measure.. the opposite of what we tend to do when there’s lots to “do”!

So last Tuesday, at the end of a full and beautiful day of sessions, I happy-sad-ly said goodbye to my Northcote/Melbourne clinic for a while so I can focus my energies up North.

I spent 2 nights down on the Mornington Penninsula with dear friends and went for a walk/jog up and down its sandy coastal tracks. I put my head on trees and my bum on sand. I listened.

I had my first ever float tank. Universes of silence ForEver. It wasnt all comfortable!

I slept a lot.

In the sun.

With a blanket – on my head!

Here’s some pics from my walk:

So, today this email is just a hello in your inbox, an update from me and a curiosity.. how are you doing, riding the waves of life?

I’m wishing you many good things and the strength and capacity to hold all that life brings. May the stream carry you somewhere delicious and restful

x with love, Amanda

Psst.. want to know whats happening in Wisdom Body world of offerings? You can keep in touch in social media land here

Don’t mind those packing boxes, or the scaffolding, things are still finding their place and being moved around … it takes a while to land in a new home.

But here, I’ve cleared a spot on the couch and found the tea and a couple of mugs. Come and have a seat, it’s been a big 2 months…hooleydooley whacka-doo, it. has. Been. a. CORKA! And I’d love to share some of the gems on internal love I’ve gathered in the move-about-upheaval.

To make it interesting (for me) .. I’m gonna share the gems point style…

1). External things (people, places, objects) can support inner Love, but they don’t substitute for it. Inner Love is an internal job, and that takes grit.

A few months ago, I was living in a heavenly beachside home, in a relationship that felt divinely gifted and I remember walking on the beach with this sweet-sad realisation … that it was easy to feel blissful and connected while I had all this external support, but that at some point it might be up to me to maintain that inner divine state if or when these external things changed (cause, the one constant in life is change, apparently).

What felt like just a few short weeks later, I was no longer in the relationship and had been given notice to move out from my heavenly house. (Gotta stop having these wise but very unhelpful insights into the nature of impermanence when things are yummy! Man! Wish I’d remember impermanence more when things are tricky!)

What a testing ground.

Hooley Dooley Whacka-do (to be polite)

What ensued has been super chaotic and Telling about the underside of my psyche. But under all of that is a quiet, warm sense that the love doesn’t go anywhere. The internal states of connection and love that I found when deep in a love affair and being held in the peaceful trees and beach of a dream home, are actually still here.

The chaos is here and emotional attachment is here. But even deeper is Love. Or even.. warm stability.

So.. a key to building inner love?

Notice it’s there. Go where life is pointing you to go. Go where it’s dancing you, go where it’s dragging you. Look for and be curious about love’s presence even in the darkest, most chaotic places.

Remember love is not determined by external factors.

2) When you work with others’ inner realms.. you gotta know your own -DEEPLY.

Aka: working with others Stuff = Working with your own stuff  (or. The “work” don’t end with the Certification-to-practice-in-hand)

Cause, the way I see it, this work of traveling into others psyches.. plumbing the depths for the gold of their soul.. it doesn’t just happen cause I like hanging out with humans and seeing them glow..

It happens (partly) cause I’ve been willing (ummm, let’s be honest.. DRAGGED kicking and screaming!!) to go to my own edges and, with the help of my own ally’s, have plumbed the depths for my own gold over and over again.

This point would apply to you if you are a mum raising children (if you want to help them with healthy boundaries on the playground.. you’ve gotta know what that’s like and know how to have them in your world first)

If you are an employer or any kind of guide and leader of other human beings.

When we ask others to do something (clean up after themselves, organize their time well, complete projects, face an inner demon.. we’ve usually gotta model it .. “transmission” is Huge)

We’ve gotta know the territory to be able to guide Anybody out and into triumph!

And at the end of the day, it’s 1000 times of an honor to be able to help another human walk their undersides and arise triumphant and more in touch with the Soul in their body.

So as I humbly pick through my literal and figurative boxes of Stuff, I hand to you this gem of kindness…

We’re all divine creatures doing our best to fit into these Little human lives and it’s All fodder for the growing of love.

And I wish you so much love, in any crevice or glorious cavern you can find.

…….

Things’ll be shifting around for a bit here. You might notice the look and feel changing.. a new website is on its way, I’m off to have a professional photo shoot later this week, and.. I’ve joined Instagram: @Wisdombody11.. very much a newbie there!

And, one area of this new home is exquisitely clear, my new session room in Ocean Shores. Please come along and experience the delicious energy here!  (pics coming soon)

Big love to you

Or, to be more specific, loving when you’ve been hurt, when you’ve got no “reason to” trust, is deeply courageous.

I’ve been working a lot with people with developmental trauma lately… in some way Mum or Dad weren’t safe, weren’t there, weren’t able to create a safe ground to expand into. Life started with a preciousness in them unmet.

It’s beautiful (I Love it) to be around people who have a secure sense of themselves in love. Who love easily, who trust love, trust they will Be loved, who innately create stability in relationship. My system widens, warms and expands around them. I feel safe.

But it’s those who’ve been deeply hurt in love who are my Hero’s.

The ones who continue to walk up to the edge of opening and sometimes jump in and open wider, even though their past tells them it will hurt, even if opening their heart in those places feels like fire. Because something calls them in. Connection and longing for more. KNOWING they’re more. Fuck. It breaks me open.

It is So courageous, brave and wildly strong to love in the face of a broken heart. I bow to the power of people to renew, to face themselves and keep moving towards the truth that we are all love and Love wants to love us. In my experience, that’s not some platitude but a tangible experience when we turn and look at it.

I bow… to the beautiful, exquisite heart who believes they are broken because their earliest caregivers couldn’t reflect their glory. I bow to your courage. I bow to the beauty in you, to your still being here.. whether it is deep in the cave, protecting your heart, out on the edges of the cliff, or flying without a parachute. I see you.

And here’s a song I like about love  🙂

And if you’d like to book in a session or have a chat with me about what might be possible for you can book in here: http://www.wisdombody.com.au/book-now/

Today I want to share a love note. A bow to the humility and humanness in us all, as, perhaps you look back in reflection on your year.

At the end of every the year for the past 8+ years I have a spiritual teacher visit my hometown, and over the years she, and her teachings, have touched me very deeply and “taught me” a lot about love, about the mind and about True nature.  

A few Friday’s ago it was the first public meeting of her visit in the Shire, and I witnessed the size of her love and the way people became beautiful, authentic versions of themselves when they talked with her. My heart opened wide, I laughed till my cheeks hurt, and I remembered the incredible love I have found in her presence before, and forgotten. Again and again as I dive back into daily living and doing.

When I left that night, the laughter and love that had opened me wide again, brought up a big welling of grief. Grief for the way I’ve honoured my mind over what I know to be true, for the way I’ve chased and fed my fears, rather than the truth I found when sitting with her. A kind of desperate sadness to have lost something so precious in the flood of focus on living and survival.

And this is what I heard from inside my heart that I want to offer you.

Life will wait for you.

Your true nature, the love that is the base of you, and that is bigger than your “Amanda” or “Shane” or “Mary”… doesn’t mind if you spend 100 years chasing your tail in fear, anger or sadness.

It doesn’t mind if you give your thoughts, time and energy to your selfishness, your jealousy, your anger, your pettiness.

These things don’t touch who you are at all.

True nature is intelligent and deeply lovingly wise. You can’t get it wrong, can’t waste time. (That’s just a trick of the mind). But you can choose love and your true nature sooner. But only because something in you wants it.

Not because you should.

Be your Amanda, Mary or Shane.

Walk your walk and listen for the wise hum below and in it all.

You can’t get it wrong and love wants you as much as you want it.

And how glorious is That 🙂

Be well dear human!

with love

Amanda

In the last few weeks I’ve been doing some gentle (but consistent) energy & chi building practices and, as I feel more rested, resourced and happy in my heart, and as my life starts to reflect that inner well-being back to me via friendly, loving people & synchronistic events, a very clear realization has come to me (with some help.. let me explain below).

When energy is flowing well, it moves throughout the body freely and draws energy

… Up from the earth, from the natural environment, and from harmonious people, places, things. When it’s flowing well, it’s obvious when something ISN’T harmonious and enhancing, so we naturally will gravitate away from that thing, keeping our energy flowing and healthy.

The problem with trauma, shock or stored negativity is that they are like a block in your funnel.

A frozen place where energy gets stuck, and you therefore need to revert to “the past” to know how to respond to your environment. This is a good “survival” strategy, but not necessarily a good Thriving strategy. And being stuck in survival can feel very stressful if done over time (believe me, baby, I know)!

Trauma, shock or stored negativity can essentially keep us in a loop within our own energy system, and as Joe Dispenza says, we stay in the lower energy centers (realted to bodily survival) & we start to use our own resources of energy to run our life, rather than the energy of our own connection to source/life-force/chi (the bigger field around and inside us).

What I see in my work with trauma is that when we start touching on a trauma (with slow and present awareness), energy begins to mobilize. We are unlocking the frozen places, and this is good (it doesn’t often feel good at first, but that shifts a lot once the stored energy is mobilised/expressed).

THIS is what I want to share with you on the VALUE of getting your energy moving, and feeding your system with positive life force and self connection.

Because…

>> We can’t create (back up) what we want if we come from a depleted life force <<

We might say we have a dream, a new business idea, a plan for an awesome holiday.. but if we are stuck in survival, many of these “new” things” will turn out like the “old things”… because the system that is creating them is not able to allow new, fresh chi and the unknown IN.

It doesn’t matter what you’re drawn to here (money, love, health, inner peace) if you are depleted, it is harder to feel your natural life-force energy (and the natural joy that it is) and it’s like you dont have “credit” in your bank account.

*Cue big Italian guy at a fruit stall* “eh! Mate, what are you gonna pay for that Expansion with?!! No credit, no Expansion, Eh!!”

…

So, yes, the trouble with trauma is that it limits the amount of life-force that is able to flow through a body. But when energy is Gently mobilised with kind and soft awareness, those blockages in the funnel will soften and dissolve and you will be free from negative loops. I have seen this over and over again.

And then, and even during that, you can Really focus on chi cultivation, on breathing your energy up to your heart (a daily gratiude journal can help this), up into your throat, and brain and more expanded/connected consciousness.

So in the spirit of all of that… Here’s a little ditty of a dit. A boogey of a boog. Energy moving and chi making a giggle on a face and in some hands. (It’s a dance video.. of me.. being silly. Here)

This client explained that he understands that what we focus on expands, and, I definitely experience this to be true, in fact that’s a core of what makes my work Work. We use our focus to develop strength and capacity, to build and create beautiful things.
But what he was expressing was a fear that if he turns and faces the trauma and locked patterns in his body, that he will create more of it (by the law of attraction) in his life.

So I want to address this, because it’s a concern that I see effecting many people’s ability to be deeply present with themselves, and to actually build new brain pathways towards greater health and resiliency.

There’s a school of thought that says “if you are experiencing pain, the best thing to do is to focus on what feels better and keep building your focus on that, and the pain will melt away”.

Now that works to a Certain extent, but it doesn’t take into account the automatic programming in our physiology, nervous system and brain pathways.It doesn’t take into account the high charge that can be in the body of someone who has experienced highly challenging or traumatic events. And we all have some version of something challenging either in our own or our family history.

We can consciously choose to focus on pleasure, but if the body is holding unconscious trauma, fear or hyper vigilance (for eg), focussing on pleasure can be a bandaid that works till that trauma is unconsciously (or consciously) triggered.

And then, the body takes over as it goes into survival responses.

In this experience, I see many people become self-judgemental and feel shame that they couldn’t maintain their focus on pleasure and shift out of pain. And of course the combination of survival-strength sensations, feelings and shame is something we naturally don’t want to get more of.

The way I view this pleasure/pain dynamic is that we want to be able to Look at difficulty, if it is here! 

Difficulty can be such a teacher and strengthener, but not if we ignore it.

So, in answer to the question “doesn’t focussing on fear bring more fear?”.. I want to share how I use FOCUS to help build resilience, presence and inner connection with a sense of Home*. How that focus is not about avoidingfear, but strengthening the foundations that can hold the fear, creating the safety to be able tofeel the fear without fear of it.

This approach doesn’t bring more fear, but allows it to move through in a gentle way so we have More space to feel the whole spectrum.

* I want to be transparent here, that my intention in sessions is to help you to find your way Home into yourself. To me, your inner “home” holds everything you want and need, not in a “happy all the time way”, but in a good and true and grounded way.

………….

When I’m working with someone and they bring something like:

“I feel anxious a lot of the time”

My focus will be on the witness that is able to observe this experience.

On building their capacity as both as a human being and a consciousness, and as a physiology that is able to tolerably manage (sometimes) large amounts of charge/energy moving through it.

On building capacity to be present to whatever life is moving through you. 

Because when we focus on our containment, our largeness… that largeness, that capacity and strength, expands. We become more solid, more present, more anchored.

And what is possible when we do that …  when I don’t shrink back from fear because I’m scared.

When you’re relaxed, even when trauma or constriction is here.. then, the constriction moves through a larger field of relaxation.

Then you begin to identify yourself with relaxation, with love, with the field that holds all these things.

So I want to bring this back to my clients question “If I focus on fear, (in the law of attraction) wont it bring me more fear?”

And my answer is, it might seem like that at first. Because it’s quite possible that if you’ve set up your management patterns, trying to keep fear away, that when  you start to pay attention to what’s happening in your self, you might begin to notice fear is in many places in you, cause you’ve pushed it away and tried to control it.

But as you focus on… “is this ok in this moment to feel this fear?”, the fear may very well start to soften and move and shift into something new.

Once you have a sense of your containment and capacity, then you can turn for a moment towards the fear. And I want to share with you, that if we turn for a moment towards the fear, and give yourself, give in to that fear totally, for just a moment, it will shift into something else, it will become excitement, shivering. It will be Space for your body to shake it off and move into something else.

It’s the resistance to the fear that holds it in place, and keeps “bringing it back”.

So I would re-word the above question in my answer as:

“If you avoid fear (because you’re scared of feeling it) this will tend to strengthen it and make it seem bigger than it is. If you can learn to soften around it, focus on your strength and capacity, there will be more space for it to move through and for you to feel feelings such as peace, joy, contentment and power”

So my advice to you is to do what you can to create foundation and safety in your self in your life in a felt sense way, and then turn towards the monsters you’ve been running from.

And if fear has been your shadow and that sounds like a crazy idea, or way too overwhelming, I’m here. You can reach out to me by email, or see more about this work here.

These are powerful things to do (and they often work!), but they can also distract us from the fullness and beauty of This moment, and can sometimes create tension .. as a teacher of mine says “too much intention causes tension”.

So, I’d like to offer something to the “intention-setting”pot.. that

Life is a call and response thing.

Life is Always responding. It can’t help it.. and you don’t have to Do anything or Be anything different for life to respond to your call. It’s actually all happening in the effortlessness.

And Effort (trying and “doing it right”) is sometimes the thing that gets in the way of things showing up with ease?!

Over the next few days I’m going to be sharing a bit about letting go and prayer to inspire your effortless welcoming of your desires in 2018, and also, what to do when you’re feeling effortful and stuck (aka, attached, emotional or doubting.. aka.. moving into effort or collapse).

Why might I be someone you’d listen to on this stuff? Well.. I’ve spent YEARS chasing and getting all het-up about my intentions! Put Lots of energy into making myself “better” so my longings (a better relationship, more money, more security etc etc) would come to me. I’m someone to listen to because of all the ways I’ve made it so hard for myself .. when it Really didn’t need to be!

I’m also someone who has spent years in an Essence school training learning to listen to the flow of god-force/life/essence and letting the non-physical essence of things guide me, and then years working with others to help them listen to and be guided by that gentle inner voice.

I’ve seen a lot of the glory and the underbelly of intention setting-land. A lot of the ways the personality comes in and tries to Do it. And I’ve experienced my own personality getting out of the way in my life and effortlessness taking root (SUCH a relief!).

So, my lovely, I have a gentle invitation for you…

Love your longings.. cuddle up with them, let there be space in the feeling of them

Listen in to the ones you have in your quiet times
Those gentle longings to rest more
To live more freely with more abandon
To do that thing that makes your heart sing

Allow yourself to dream
Let all the ideas and longings just bubble up without filter
Everything is ok
Everything is offered for a reason

You came here with a particular leaning
A particular skill set
A particular shape

Let it blossom and Be
(You’ll feel so much better for it)